Lately it has been a struggle with my youngest. He is the type of annoying that only a mother can love. Everyone promises it is a “phase”. Despite the turmoil…God still uses him to teach me lessons in the simplest ways.
I have felt the tension between us but sadly so has my baby and just last night I was praying to God to not allow my attitude to harden his heart in any way.
This morning at the breakfast table Frederick was in full imagination mode. He was talking about monsters and carrying around he stuffed dinosaurs. He continued telling me about what he had dreamt about and asking his brother and I an incessant list of questions that no one could understand but he expectantly waited for an answer. I tried to drown it out with some morning music on volume 7. Needless to say Fredrick won…mom…moM…MoM…MOM!! Inside my head, I was screaming at myself to behave and be patient, but it just came out. YES FREDERICK?!?....come look he said in small voice after being intimidated by my rudeness…I went over to him with a heavy heart, and he showed me his intentionally arranged Teddy Grahams. He told me that one was him and the other was me. He said we were together forever. See mom… I’m protecting you from the dinosaurs.
I learned so much as my heart filled with God’s lesson:
1. We can find God in everything and He is constantly teaching. Sometimes we feel like God is too big for X situation or too busy for Y problem. We judge his capacity on an inflated idea of our own instead of accepting that his capacity is unimaginably better than ours. He is there in every detail.
2. God answers prayers. Just last night I was praying for the assurance that my sons’ heart would remain soft and tender, filled with love towards me despite our current issues. Today God’s choice teaching tool was Teddy Grahams. Of course he loves me.
3. God helps you process your mistakes. I prayed for Fred’s heart. A hardened heart can be one of the hardest things in life to overcome. I wouldn’t want to be the one who caused that process to begin in my son. God today showed me that it was never his heart that was hardening but mine.
God not only listened to me, but he answered my prayer and taught me a lesson.
He is everywhere, in everything.
What is he saying to you today?
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